I wrote often during My Year of Hugs how when life went sideways and I had to detour from my planned day, that was often where my best stories came from. I gushed about how allowing myself the grace to pivot when things didn't go my way led to magical experiences.
I forget this. Often. But, is it really about the detour? Let's dive in. As I was driving home from my amazing trip in Florida, my car unintentionally accelerated on the highway. (and now, as I am writing that, I realize that these scary life moments seem to be what I keep writing about. I swear they don't typically happen this often...) I needed to get home for a few obligations I had agreed to but the incident was frightening enough to want to get it checked out. The closest Toyota dealership was over an hour away and unwilling to risk the high speeds, I chose the back roads. I had almost two hours before my appointment, so I allowed myself the time to enjoy the drive. The path to the dealership was magical. I drove through a town that reminded me of my favorite city, Savannah, GA with oak trees lining the street and moss hanging gracefully from their limbs. Nearly closing my eyes I soaked in the energy and beauty of this town. I debated pulling over to the side of the road to take pictures, but some moments are impossible to capture, they are simply meant to be felt. As I got closer to the dealership in Ocala the dreamer in me delighted in recognizing that I had entered horse country. There were farms everywhere. I took mental notes of which entrances and layouts resonated most with me for when I daydreamed about my own farm. I began mapping out how it would look and recognizing how I wanted it to feel when others showed up to visit based on how I was feeling as I passed by each farm. By the time I got to the dealership, I was thrilled with my detour and excited for what more might transpire. This was where the energy shifted; or probably more accurately said, my focus shifted. Everyone at the dealership was friendly and accommodating. No one gave me any grief over bringing my dog and cat (in his carrier) in to the lobby. There was free coffee and wifi. I had everything I needed. They were taking care of my car. But, all I could focus on was the wasted time I was spending there and the obligations I may miss, especially when they returned to tell me they couldn't find anything wrong. The parent company insisted there was nothing wrong and it was likely my aftermarket floor mats (which had been the first thing I checked). A few too many benjamins later, I checked in to the hotel I hadn't intended spending the night in. Frustrated and anxious over finances and a car that had no apparent reason for accelerating, I clicked on a movie and drifted off into a fitful sleep. What I remembered most about the event up until this point was the frustration and anxiety. But, in the process of writing this blog I remembered the magic of the drive to the dealership through an unexpected town lined with the beauty of the oak trees. I remembered how inspired I felt driving past the multitude of horse farms dreaming about the day it will be mine. I remembered how all of my obligations effortlessly reorganized themselves as each one got rescheduled before I even had a chance to be the one to reschedule. I remembered how thrilled I was at seeing my typically aggressively fearful chihuahua behave with the most miraculously calm, appropriate behavior at the dealership. If all of that wasn't magic, I don't know what is. Did I need the detour to find the magic? No. I experience it every single day. But, sometimes I think the detours are what shakes me out of my well-worn behaviors and thoughts into a practice of creating new ones. Which has left me with the question: What am I choosing to focus on today; the fear and frustration of a day not going "my" way, or the satisfaction of a day filled with magic?
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorMelinda Lee is a mom of two adolescent boys, a devout student of all things spiritual, a recovering perfectionist, and immensely fascinated with achieving the unachievable. Currently writing a memoir about hugging strangers. Archives
February 2023
Categories |